Recap Renegade

Cherish the Day – Basis

February 26, 2020


Ben is watering his garden when Evan pops up on him. That was a bad move, considering that Ben lives in the hood, there’s a gate and Ben is an OG. Evan apologizes and he has come bearing a gift – bourbon.  It’s the good stuff too. So what’s up? Evan requests that they go inside and talk.

Inside, breakfast is sizzling and the kitchen is full of Ben’s buddies. They are gathered for a birthday breakfast in honor of their dude, Lucky Buddy (Gently’s dad), who passed away. It’s an annual tradition. Evan really wants to talk to Ben alone but it ain’t happening. ALL of them are Gently’s uncles, so they all gon stay. They invite him to have a seat at an alarmingly lil table. They offer him food, which he declines, but they put a plate in front of him anyway. You gon eat tuhday.  Cheese or sugar on your grits? *record scratch* Ummmm…sugar should NEVER be a choice for your grits. If you want sweet grits, go for some Cream of Wheat because turning your grits into something they shouldn’t be with sugar is pure blasphemy. Me and my southern roots could go on forever about this, but I will spare you. He goes for butter and ole dude dumps it on his grits. This ain’t a friendly crowd. The uncles get into a comparison match about who Gently’s favorite uncle is and it’s the sweetest thing ever. They all raised her. They taught her how to ride a bike, do her hair and everything else. They were her village and they are proud of it. This was a beautiful #girldad moment and it made me love Ben and the OGs even more. They stop to say grace and ask Evan to do it. Now…a few episodes ago, Evan told Gently that he was a church boy, so I expected this food to be graced correctly. But that didn’t happen. “Umm…we are…ummmm..thankful and grateful for the life of…ummmmm…Lucky Buddy…In Jesus name…Amen. Ben said it was a shitty prayer but God knows their hearts so whatever. LOL. I love Ben.  Anyway, Evan is there to ask for Gently’s hand in marriage.   The OGs are shocked but mostly they are in their feelings because Gently is a grown woman now. They are cute. Ben says he has always dreamed of Gently finding someone who will treat her how she deserves to be treated. He lowkey threatens Evan, but immediately welcomes him to the family. The breakfast turns into a celebration. Yayyyyyyy!!! 

Evan returns to the house. It’s a big day. He’s looking for new office space.  Gently looks happy and she’s proud of Evan. Apparently, the app is ready for launch.  It’s the hottest day of the year and Gently isn’t looking forward to figuring out how to keep Miss Luma cool.  At Luma’s house, a fan is blowing right in Luma’s face as she shares a story from the past with Gently. She auditioned for a part and she gave it all she had. She blew them away, but she didn’t fit their idea of what a leading lady should look like.  Gently is amazed at how Miss Luma has weathered the storm.  For Luma, it wasn’t about getting the part, it was about not EVER letting anyone put her in a box because boxes are prisons and she’s free. Whew. That’s your sermon for today. Yasssss, Miss Luma!  So Gently tries to come up with places that they can go to get outta Miss Luma’s hot arse house and Miss Luma ain’t budging. I was feeling sorry for Gently because I have been there. My grandma’s house in the summer wasn’t what you wanted for your life. I felt her pain and I was triggered.


Evan tours the home of his future office. It’s close to launch and they need an upgrade, but the space is overbudget. Evan’s partner isn’t on board, especially since they don’t “have it like that.” Evan reminds him that they left their job over a year ago and they are about to BLOW UP. Act like you know. Being with Gently done made Evan a true risk taker (in more ways than one). 

Back at Luma’s they struggling in the heat. Luma is about to send Gently on some random errand to get some mint for her lemonade when Evan pops up.  He asks Gently to come away with him on an adventure. But she can’t because she’s working and she has to stay with Luma. Then Luma’s ride rolls up and Luma comes out the doe looking all fabulous.  She was in on this whole situation and I love it and her. Before she leaves, she reminds Evan that he better take good care of her girl. PeriodT.


Evan and Gently are out and headed to Malibu. *SN: do we have a ‘ship name for them? Evenlty? Gevan? What is it?* Anyway. These two finally find a song that they both want to hear and they rhyme together. They didn’t miss any words. They were flowin. This is the pinnacle of a relationship right here. It’s nirvana. Gently gets the 411 on the office situation. Evan tells her all about it and that he got the space. He is ready to take this huge leap. Gently says, “when you know, you know.” Yep.


They have arrived and they have a marvelous room with a magnificent view of the ocean.  Evan has even packed a bag for Gently and he did a great job. He even picked out a dress that she loves. *insert heart emoji here*  Gently asks why he’s doing all this and Evan replies that there’s no reason…just that he loves her. Some hiking boots were in the bag and these two crazy kids head on out for an adventure. Evan is beyond ready with all of his safety gear and Gently tells him he is doing THEE MOST.  Evan don’t care. Safety first. Now let’s head out.  Evan tells Gently that this spot is special to him because his granddad used to bring him there every year. Maybe they can start coming here and make their own tradition. It’s sweet, but Gently is turned off. Evan stops to dig in his handy dandy backpack and Gently disappears into the wild blue yonder. Yall…I swear Gently got adult ADHD. Evan panics and calls her name over and over again. Finally, he finds her. She says she went to go look at some flowers. I don’t eBen know if that’s really true. I think she was doing what she always does and ran away.  Gently apologizes for her foolery.

Back in the room, they are getting ready for dinner.  Gently’s energy is still off to me. She starts looking through Evan’s stuff. Why, Gently? Why? Eventually, she finds what she’s looking for. Her ring is in his coat pocket. Ughhhhhhhhh! Gently. You stay working my nerBs. So she found the ring and her reaction isn’t what I wanted to see. She doesn’t look happy at all.  They make it to a beautiful waterfront dinner that Evan planned and Gently looks shook. She ain’t ready for what’s bout to happen.  Evan has thought of everything.  Wine. 7-course meal. Oh…and dessert. Lil Debbie oatmeal cream pies because that’s what she likes. LOL.  Gently tells him that no one has ever done anything like this for her before.  Gently tries to stop what’s about to happen, but then she lets it happen. Evan pops the questions. All the people are waiting for her to answer. And she does. Yes. But that yes made my heart hurt. That yes wasn’t a real yes. That yes is about to come with some problems. The crowd celebrates and Gently still looks shook. This finna be a situation.


After the engagement, Evan is on Cloud 20. He is already making wedding plans and letting Gently know what she’s in for with his family (that’s a whole nother set of problems).  As they walk on the beach, Evan continues with all the plans he’s made. Gently just wants to talk.  She tells him that at the restaurant, there were just so many people and she needed a moment…and basically, she needs time. *le sigh* What’s funny is that at that moment, some folks that were at the restaurant came to congratulate them and called them couple goals. Everything ain’t what it seems…that’s true for them and in real life. Well, now Evan is pissed off. Do you even know what you want? Have you ever known? Her only response is that she needs time and she gives him the ring back. YALLLLLL!!!!! I was so sad. Evan takes the ring and walks away, leaving Gently on the beach. He is so heartbroken. I just wanted to swoop in and give him a hug. He walks up to the bar, gets a drink and asks the bartender if he knows anyone who would want to buy a ring. It’s 10 carats. *record scratch* 10 carats? Well gahtdamb. Anyway, Evan was all in his feelings and he wasn’t thinking clearly. Poor guy. 

Back at the room, Gently wants to talk. Evan isn’t having it.  You said no, and that’s all that needs to be said. You can have all the time you want. Holla. Yall know Evan is the most patient man on EarF, and he is usually game for giving Gently second chances, but that seems to be over.  Can they come back from this?


Evan drives Gently home. She is still trying to talk about it. Nothing has changed. She still loves him…more deeply than she has loved anyone in her life, but everything can’t always be on his time. That’s all.  Evan isn’t even making eye contact, but he IS crying. Ughhhhhh!

Gently is crying too, as she tells Ben about what happened.  She explains that she couldn’t say yes, but she doesn’t even know why.  Ben says it’s hard for her to trust that things can actually be good, and he understands that.  But, sometimes, you gotta let that sh*t go (sermon #2). Let it go. All of it. Gently wants to be with him. She knows that. Ben tells her that she needs to make room for him, if that’s the case. He treats her right. He looks at her like she’s everything in the world to him and that matters. Go get yo man, girl!

Evan is talking to Nick. Nick is venting…which I find kind of insensitive. I am assuming that Evan told him why he was there. Instead of being there for Evan, Nick decides to tell him all about his marriage to Evan’s sister. I mean…why? I hope that my husband would never go to my brother to talk about our marriage in this way. Nick is on my nerBs. Evan is doing his best to be positive (despite all he’s going through) and suggests therapy. Nick kind of ignores that and confesses that he has an apartment in San Francisco. He stays there twice a week. Say whet? And then, Gently comes to get her man!

Gently is calling for Evan. Nick is like…what are you doing? Don’t look back. You are free. Yall know Nick is a hater. Gently lets it all out. She made a mistake and she got scared.  She can’t understand what’s happening. She does know that his love is turning her into someone new and she has to deal with that and her baggage. Evan tells her that everybody has stuff and being married doesn’t mean you become perfect, it just means that you have somebody by your side for the hard stuff. Another sermon.

And then Gently asks Evan to marry her. Evan can’t go out like that. He proposes again. She accepts. This time for real and with no second thoughts.

This episode gave me a Queen Sugarish hangover. There were so many emotions. I ain’t gon lie. At 11:00, I was ready to get off of this emotional rollercoaster. It was exhausting.

Whew! This episode. Where shall I begin? Let’s start by giving props to my favorite people. Miss Luma and Ben. Miss Luma is just majestic and I live for her stories, her wisdom and any glimpse of her former life where she had to slay the dragons of segregration, discrimination and disrespect. She gives me those good grandma vibes and I am here for them all. Ben is the real MVP. He scooped Gently up when her dad died and he is the epitome of a girldad. And how about his friends? All of them became father figures to Gently and though they are tough on the outside, on the inside that are soft as cotton candy – especially when Gently is concerned. I loved them reminiscing about raising Gently. They are the best.

Gently. Gently cannot even believe that someone would want to love her the way Evan loves her. All of the baggage she has keeps her blinded and unable to accept unconditional love. One of my favorite Toni Morrison quotes is “Can’t nobody fly with all that sh*t. Wanna fly you got to give up the sh*t that weighs you down.” Ben was giving Gently nothing but facts – Snapple facts, as my girl would say. LET IT GO, SIS! Gently is deserving of this love. She just has to believe that she is. Her inability to do so has been what’s been working my last nerB since day 1 on this Cherish journey. She was always finding a way to mess things up. I hope she is actually ready to be loved.

Evan. You know, I am usually 100% on Evan’s side.  But last night, I started having some feelings. I was wondering why they had never even discussed their future. In one and a half years, he never brought up marriage? With a wildcard like Gently, I feel like that’s a given. You gotta get Gently ready for something this big.  That was on him.  How has this dating thing been going with them? Gently mentioned that everything can’t always be on his time.  Has that been an issue? He wants things when he wants them…or was Gently making stuff up.  I think Evan needs to do a better job of understanding who he’s with.  That will be key if they are really going to do this marriage thang.

Soon to be ex-brother in law. Nick rubbed me the wrong way. He was straight venting to Evan when Evan was clearly experiencing one of the most disappointing nights of his life. And I am sure Evan doesn’t want to hear about how awful of a wife his sister is. Also, Nick has never been in support of a relationship with Gently. Why would Evan even go over there? Maybe that’s Evan’s fault.

Love and Forgiveness. I was a little surprised by Evan’s behavior after Gently gave him the ring back and his unwillingness to talk.  I know he was heartbroken and all up in his feelings and I get it. But, Evan is usually so forgiving and understanding…and patient. I don’t blame him…I’m just saying.  In the end, he was able to give Gently a second chance and their love conquered all.

So…they are engaged. I am happy for them, but I am anxious for them as well. Evan seems to have planned this wedding allllll the way out and you know Mama Fisher is ready to drop all of her coins and have the wedding of HER dreams for her baby boy. How is this gonna work? I promise you Gently doesn’t even want a wedding. And she shole doesn’t want Mama Fisher to be stalking her every move. And what’s gon happen when Ben and the OGs meet the Fishers. I really hope that their love is strong enough to endure what’s coming next, because it won’t be pretty or easy.

Welp. That’s all I got. See yall next week.

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